It's so much fun.
It really is-- all the torturous mornings walking to cardio with the early morning smells filling my nostrils. Walking home after with Yohimbine-HCL drip and crazy cardio hair making me look more like a walk of shame from a rave than a dedicated bodybuilding competitor.
Nobody let me know about the un-prep. Well, Layne Norton videos and YouTube obsessions with Amanda Bucci and Emily Hayden let me in on it a little, but I guess I never SEARCHED for information on exactly what would happen. You want to know what happened, don't you? okay. I'll tell you.
My ass is AMAZING now! I constantly have coffee breath with actual fake creamer flavoring my tongue. My abs are gone, and I don't care. My smile is humongous and Ryan and I were joking this morning that the reason I now have multiple dimples in my cheeks is because I'm getting face cellulite. I'm very smiley. But, I'm also very snacky...let me explain.
I work from home (blessed, yes, I know) and I've recently moved to the dining room table for posture and lighting. Right next to the pantry. And the refrigerator. And the tv. I will make myself a sandwich using a Costco pita (effing yum, dude), shredded cheese, mayo, Sausalitio Boar's Head turkey (effing yum, dude) and Taco Bell's Hot sauce. The macros are amazing for a normal lunch: 41 c 15 f 33 p 435 kcal But when you're coming off of 50g carbs for 8 weeks and those only came from vegetables....AND it's only one of 5 meals....you can see my predicament, I'm sure?
Enter Sonic ice with powdered crystal light sprinkled on top, sugar free Jell-O (thank you to Adam McVey of Gear'd up podcast for this life saving tip) and diet cherry pepsi. I'm finding it hard to not be constantly shoveling food into my mouth so I decided to fill in the blanks with these calorie-free options. THIS IS NOT THE IDEAL PLAN! I know this, but hey, I'm here to show everyone bored enough to read my rantings that even a super mom with a perfect marriage and a catwalk-ready body (sarcasm, people) can have an 'off' day and need some options so I don't eat the dog.
I've recently posted on my Instagram that I'm taking on a couple of FREE diet plan clients. I want someone who may not have the financial resources, but has all the heart and ambition to become a better them. I want them to have a cheerleader, a resource, a counselor and a friend through what truly can be like rehab. Learning how to eat properly is not as simple as telling someone to shop the outer rim of the grocer's. It's not as easy as saying "Don't eat anymore sugar. Don't eat anymore fast food. If you don't make it at home, it's not worth putting in your face." There is a habit that must be broken. Making someone believe that if they only do a couple of things right and it will work will only make them come down harder on themselves if it doesn't work. i.e. telling someone the list above and doing a check-in with them 6 weeks later to see no visual progress and no movement on the scale will make them think the process won't work for them. In reality, they may have been drinking juice, drinking alcohol, eating at inappropriate times of the day for their schedule, eating imbalanced macros for their body type. If we don't, as diet coaches, take the time to really get our friends to open up to us about their wins, losses and goals, they will fail and it will be our fault.
Please call or email me or forward this blog post to someone you feel is worthy of free food rehab.
Thank you, Iron Junkies!! I love you all. :)